Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Grief Hurts

My father-in-law died yesterday morning. Probably the way he would have wanted to go; a massive, sudden heart attack at home. He probably didn't even know what was happening. I'm sure he would have chosen that over a long lingering decline.

Last weekend he made the long car trip to L.A. to see his daughter happily married. I think he was holding out for that. I think he finished the last chapter of his life with joy. I know he loved the kids and loved seeing them grow. He liked to play backgammon with Jungle Boy and do math quizzes with Wasabi Girl.

My mother-in-law is practical and industrious and doing what she needs to do. My husband was at a conference in Las Vegas and came home yesterday evening. His newly married sister was on her honeymoon and will cut it short to fly home from Paris today.

When the kids came home from school I had to break the news. Is there any harder conversation than telling your kids that a beloved grandfather is dead?

And I am here to keep the home fires burning. To feed and hug and cry in the shower, because that's where I cry.

Home. Everybody home. It's the theme for this month's NaBloPoMo. I didn't think this is what I would write about.

17 people stopped folding laundry to write:

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. Take care.

Beth said...

I'm so sorry to hear about your father-in-law passing away. Its so hard to lose people we care about. Make sure you take care of yourself as you're taking care of your family.

~Beth

Anonymous said...

Oh I am so sorry. My heart goes out to your family. When I had to explain my father's death to the kids it hurt. They still hurt and miss him dearly. I'm thinking of you.

Carissa(GoodnCrazy) said...

Wow, so sorry. We've lost 3 grandparents in the last year between my husband and I. And none of them were sudden, that's so much harder. I hope the kids understand it all.

Cookie said...

My heart goes out to you and your family. I know you're a strong person and you'll find your way through this.

Burbank Babe said...

Let us know if you need anything. We are so sorry for your loss. I'm not a shower, but you can call me 24/7 if you need a good cry.

Cheryl Lage said...

So very sorry for your family's loss...you've described it with spartan beauty and respect. The last few lines are so poetic.
Peace and a warm shower.

Jocasta said...

I'm so sorry and we will be thinking of you and your family.

Anonymous said...

This is my first visit to your blog- I found you at Adventures of an Orthodox Mom. I am a fellow Orthodox Mom Blogger; although, most of my posts have nothing to do with that. I am still trying to find my blog niche.

I've enjoyed reading your blog and I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your father-in-law.

magda said...

May his memory be eternal.

My father's one-year anniversary is coming up, and I remember feeling like he was in the altar: someplace I couldn't get to right now, but close to God and praying for me. When I was little, he would talk about death and say he didn't understand why anyone would be sad if he died: he wanted to go to heaven, and that would be cause for celebration!

I still miss him fiercely, though, and I hurt for your loss.

Unknown said...

Even more hugs and love from us.

WIDNEY WOMAN said...

I am so sorry to hear of the passing of your father-in-law. It is wonderful he was able to attend his daughter's wedding, spend time with family, and get some pictures with everyone. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.

Kira said...

Sending your family lots of love, hugs and prayers. Losing someone so close can be so heartbreaking but just remember they always stay with you in your heart and memories! Take care, I'll be keeping you and your family in my thoughts today.

-Kira

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry about your Father in Law. May God bless you and your family and may you know His peace.

amy

What A Card said...

I'm sorry to hear about your loss. Wishing peace to your family.

Liz Jimenez said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm glad at least that your father-in-law got to experience such a happy event before he passed.

Anonymous said...

That is such a terribly sad thing to read - I'm so sorry for your loss!

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