The Agony of Defeat

This is a hard moment in my parenting life.  Last year Wasabi Girl sailed through her gymnastics meets and ended up first place all around in her division at the statewide competition.  She was then, and still is, team captain.

This past weekend was the qualifying meet for the state championships.  A minimum cumulative score was required to qualify.  She held her own until the vault - and then bobbled it.  We held our breath in the stands.  Every competitor gets two tries on the vault and the best score is used.  But then she bobbled it again.  She knew the score she had to get and even from far away, we could tell how she felt from her body language when she saw her score.

She was brave, and held it together as best she could.  But she was clearly upset.

The girls sign a contract when they join the team, and right at the top is rule #1:  NO CRYING.  No matter what.  She wanted to.  I wanted to.  But the rule is there for a reason, and the competition had to finish.

After every gymnastics meet, all of the girls from all of the teams gather to sit on the floor during the awards ceremony.  There was the usual long delay while all the scores were tallied up and medals were labeled with winners' names.  While she sat, I watched from the stands, feeling so helpless to console her. 

But then I saw the demonstration of how beloved she is by her teammates.  I don't know what was said, and nothing was overly dramatic, but one by one they cozied up to her, threw an arm around her, leaned in on her shoulder.  It was a very quiet, and very beautiful demonstration of love and support on the part of these young women.  One very small member of the team even came and sat in her lap.

I'm so grateful, that as she grows and ventures out into the world where things aren't always easy, that my not-so-little girl is able to attract such a valuable support system.  Because sometimes rule #1 is just hard.